Never had that happened with any of our others. And as Ruth and Faith saw it, it wasn't their place to mess in their parents' affairs, which is why, when her husband Rudy blurted it out a few years later, Ruth was so shocked. From Marty's perspective, the genetic counselor's prediction from years before seemed to be coming true, it felt like she was losing both her mother's. She was working for a group of pediatricians, which included a genetic counselor. Marti was also married, also had three kids. And she circled my brother's name and said, this is your brother like Bob. And of course, I was very busy, because I was chairperson and I had so many other things to do. All four women said things got very lonely for them. By the time she was five or six, there wasn't much money around. My name is Bob McDonald and I am 61 years old. I didn't even dance with you. They nothing about it for 43 years. You know, you were not adopted. It was all pretty straightforward. That's in a minute, from Chicago Public Radio, when our program continues. I think what we do is pretty much our own doing. The McDonalds are the light-haired ones from the letter. They knew Reverend Miller. They were nice enough when she spoke to them on the phone, but they weren't exactly welcoming her into the family. Yeah, I wanted him to agree with me. I was just horrified and and he didn't tell me ahead of time, it just came out with it. And then they go right to do that. Tells the story of two teen girls who discover that they were accidentally switched at birth. But Sue says there are a lot of things she missed out on, too, by not growing up at the Millers, the family did all kinds of hobbies, painting and rock polishing and 3D photography. I just couldn't do it. Was there ever a time when you thought back and thought, I should have stood my ground more with him on that? And the purpose of this letter is that Mrs. Miller is breaking the news 43 years after the fact to Martha Insu that she took the wrong baby home from the hospital that Martha and was switched at birth, that she's not Martha's biological mom, she sues. When Sue got married, for instance, the Millers gave her a trivet Norbert had made. I thought it was just Rudy being Rudy. Again, Martha Miller, who now goes by Marty, who once was the baby who sneezed five times in a row. by. But I feel I must get this out in the open, so you two know how wonderful that you both are Christians and great workers in the church. I don't care whether my husband objected or not. It'll be all right. And know you have mixed feelings about this revelation. There is no gray area. Wow, that could be her. By the time she was well, fixing the baby switch problem was that much harder. Oh, that's a funny question. Store; Subscribe to our newsletter. Our staff for today's show includes Alex Blumberg, Sarah Koenig, Seth Lind, Lisa Pollak, Robin Semien, Alissa Shipp, Matt Tierney, Nancy Updike, and Diane Wu. If you have a smartphone or tablet, the easiest way to listen to this, and all the other radio shows for the class, is to download the This American Life app. Darlene Wolfgram did tell her daughter, though. Host Ira Glass introduces four characters: Kay McDonald, who raised a daughter named Sue, and Mary Miller, who raised a daughter named Marti. It was the night of December 7, 1962, and her rounded belly tightened with each contraction. She got along famously with their son Bob. I just couldn't believe it. And I'm reading this thing going, what do you mean this is my uncle, this is my brother, this is my mom and dad? My mom said, oh, well, you just take after great-grandpa this or aunt so-and-so. So. It exploded. What's the treatment? She was 98 years old. Mary Miller is 96 now, she lives by herself in the country, her house is filled with the remnants of her and Norbert's life together in the church. One of the mothers realized the mistake but chose to keep quiet until the day, more than 40 years later, when she decided to tell both daughters what happened. So that was that. The plot device of babies who are switched at birth, or in their cradles, has been a common one in American fiction since the 18th century. She didn't fit in. But I thought each of you should know your biological and spiritual backgrounds. She was just tired of secrets. And I'm not one to borrow trouble. Our website, thisamericanlife.org. Everybody's smiling. Martha excelled in music, was a great cheerleader at school, very popular, and a blonde. And there were a lot of kids too. (Paperback) by Janice Kay Johnson (Goodreads Author) Mrs. Miller has for 43 years been longing to see her, the child she'd given birth to. So then I thought, well, OK, then it's not so bad. The other daughter in this baby, Squidge Sue, who was born to Mrs. Miller, the one writing the letter but raised by Kay McDonnell. Between ourselves, Ruth and me, we, or at least I, always figured you lucked out. The nurse weighed the baby and must have left her in the delivery room until after Kay's baby was born very soon after mine. Text. And they were a bookish, serious bunch. A month after she got the letter, Sue went to see her biological mother and father. From Marti's perspective, the genetic counselor's prediction from years before seemed to be coming true, and it felt like she was losing both her mothers. All the girls were in the same room. So he said, I don't need a DNA test. My dad had this horrendous guilt, because he felt like it was all his fault that he should have believed my mother for all those years. And here I am. And so I don't think that was too well received when I mentioned that. The fact is Mrs. Miller longed for Sue for her biological daughter ever since she realized the mistake back in 1951, but it seemed futile trying to convince her husband, Norbert. On a summer day in 1951, two baby girls were born in a hospital in small-town Wisconsin. He was he, in fact, would call me and tell me, you know, I don't care what she says. Yes, I did. Sue knew her mother had never been a big fan of the Millers ever since they met. If I had as strong a feeling as she did that I had the wrong baby, I would have pursued it. She wanted to be a part of a big family. She was losing blood and having spasms. And all needed glasses for nearsightedness, Martha did not need glasses. It exploded. When Sue got married, for instance, the Millers gave her a trivett Norbert had made the card was signed from your other possible parents. That's what I'm talking about. When she finally heard from Mrs. Miller, the mother she'd grown up with, not only did she get the letter, but Mrs. Miller had just been to the 50th anniversary party of the McDonalds, Marti's biological parents. You had your own room, didn't you, all to yourself? She was a delight to all of us, so pretty, so photogenic, so full of life. He thought she really dreamed this up in her head and just got obsessed with it. Conspiracy theories about the assassination of Yitzhak Rabin continue to shape Israel's politics and future. And as that baby, Sue, grew up, the one thing that puzzled Kay was that Mrs. Miller, whom she knew only vaguely from church, seemed so interested in Sue. She didn't grow up with Sue, after all, and she's not actually related to her or to her kids. You know, so so then I thought, well, OK, then it's not so bad if she you know, she still believes she's my sister. That's Ruth she and Faith and Mary Lydia. Coming up, what it's like to be a mom and to learn at the age of 69 that your only daughter isn't actually your daughter at all, and, if that weren't bad enough, that lots of people in your town, people around you, knew years before you did. It was really good for us to have her around. I mean, that my kids are all so serious about their life. She told the counselor her story and said she wanted to get blood tests done. Besides her, there was Mary Lydia, Faith, Ruth, Sonny, Luke, and Esther. But it took a while for us to-- how are you going to think? And when Mrs. Miller finally let everybody know the truth, long after both girls were grown up with children of their own, it was disruptive. Learn more here and start watching your favorite shows now! Occasionally, she'd break down and cry. But Norbert should have gone back and said, this isn't our baby. I was a serious person. I was shy or I was whatever. He didn't dance with me. Is my brother going to care to even see me anymore? So pretty, so photogenic, so full of life. That was her idea. Jake Halpern, he's the host of the new podcast Deep Cover, about an FBI agent who goes undercover with an outlaw motorcycle gang. [00:00:33] If you're ever curious as to what they were, I would be very willing to fill you in. So at this point, you're probably wondering why in the world didn't Mrs. Miller straighten this out quicker? And when Bob found out about Marty, found out that she was his biological sister, he called her right away in California. Sue is ours. At last, Mrs. Miller felt free to act. The get-together at Bob and Kay McDonald's house didn't go exactly as she wanted. I would say that Sue and I were probably not that close for whatever reason. And I said, I don't know. And what was what was your your room like you in your own room to our room. That was enough. That's all we can do. They were married for 60 years. And. This week's podcast recommendations are my favourite episodes of This American Life, you're . So he and Mrs. Miller were invited and the Millers came. I don't have any idea. This summer, Bob McDonald, younger son, got married in period. This summer, Bob McDonald's younger son got married in Prairie du Chien. He thought she really dreamed this up in her head and. Why did you listen to her husband back in 1951? And she's going to get this popular Marti, who's so fun-loving and looks like her. I don't have any idea. Bay meets Emmett outside a college party she got dragged into when he alerts her not to be in that neighborhood late at night. We're devoting the full hour today to what happened to these two families. She wasn't malicious. The reason was pretty simple, actually. The Millers didn't have much money and they might not have been able to afford the health care otherwise. She had both families wanting to make sure that, you know, she was included in their family. Rudy had a couple of beers. I just couldn't do it. Yeah, what was your room like? She said she was really live like he always had jokes. I couldn't see any merit to it. Mark Twain. Because that was terrible to have that hanging over you all of the time. When I first talked to Mrs. Miller about what had happened when Marty was born, she told me pretty much the same story. The show ended abruptly after 5 seasons. And I said, I don't think they know anything about it. S5 . I remember talking to Mother about, you know, this is your blood daughter. I couldn't believe that Because I don't have that feeling about-- I don't think God punishes us in any way. This American Life is produced in collaboration with WBEZ Chicago and delivered to stations by PRX The Public Radio Exchange. Paul Zimmer is eighty-three years old now, and hes still haunted by something he saw in his teens. She says there's Sue walking down the center aisle. And part of it what makes this so strange is that this wasn't the sort of thing where Mrs. Miller figured this to her surprise after decades of wondering and pondering and painstaking detective work. There are birthdays and graduations and figuring out where to spend holidays. Being in the family I locked out, I lucked out. I can still wonder why and probably never will know why it didn't come up any sooner. Marti says she felt like everything she was interested in was lost on her parents. Finally, Sue handed over all the letters that she hadn't sent them in the past month, letters telling them how much she loved them and how much she wanted to stay their daughter. For starters, Mrs. Miller didn't contact Marti and Sue at the same time. I know you have mixed feelings about this revelation. Mrs. Miller told people in the Evangelical Church that her suspicions, friends of hers and people she hoped would keep an eye out on Sue. Never had that happen with any of our others. Because I had said that I had shed a lot of tears. And I don't think sue had that sense. This was a house with a lot of rules. And I didn't grow up like that at all. We love you, Martha Jane. He's a roustabout. mac miller faces indie exclusive. In fact, we were even weren't even sure we'd have another child, so of course, we were elated when I did get pregnant and and then to think that I didn't get to raise the one that I had wanted to so much and. But that's all she said. Yes. Blood tests were done with the Millers and they proved Mrs. Miller was right about the switch. I couldn't do anything. In fact, that's true. Marti's accepted that despite some of the clumsy things that her mother said and did when she broke the news to her, she meant well. I never will probably understand why, I mean. On The Road; FAQ; Submissions; Store; Contact Us; Our Other Shows; Follow Us. A couple of them, including Ruth, had vague memories of their parents talking about it after they brought Marti home from the hospital, about how this baby looked different from Mrs. Miller's other babies, and that maybe this baby had been switched. And she told somebody that I was crazy. But she didn't call them right away. And he was very angry at first with me. He's just outright he's just saying, can you forgive me just just like that on the telephone. But it seemed futile trying to convince her husband Norbert. She circled the names of people that were participating in the program like my one of my uncles on the birth side, Earl Gonzales. When I mentioned that, I told Mrs. Miller, I felt that it was God's will when she realized that she might not have the right child, I think it was his will that she do something about it. But overall, the Millers seem giddy that their daughter has finally come home and Sue seems eager to know them. They have almost nothing in common. But that's pretty much where it ends. No, no, no. Hopefully, in the years the show has been on, it has influenced people to give the beautiful language a try. And of course, I thought that was foolish. Slowly, anger began to set in. And I don't know that she was as excited about it as I was. That's how Mrs. Miller kept track of Sue. She was close to her mother. I promise you, I'll never try to make you think of me as your daughter. And I was in the hallway and Mrs. Miller said to me, Did you ever think that our girls were switched at birth? He wants people to know Jesus Christ and that they would be saved. She always referred to the girls as sisters. Why did she listen to her husband back in 1951? And basically-- and this is going to sound like kind of a small thing, but it was a big thing to me-- she circled the names of people that were participating in the program. And he did, in fact, say some hurtful things. But he didn't realize what affect that would have on everybody to make a decision like that. I think I went into a kind of a depression about similar to what I did when my mother died. She says, I was pregnant and you are my child. The nurse weighed the baby and must have left her in the delivery room until after Kay's baby was born. Even if she could somehow convince everyone it was true. This is my brother. And, you know, I mean, I understand you didn't raise her, but she is your blood, you know, biological daughter. We're devoting the full hour today to what happened to these two families. Here is how Mrs. Miller explained that in the letter. I was just not ever meeting their expectation of intellectual ism, and my mother has told me since then, you know, you I really didn't expect that much from you because I knew that you weren't our child. best seats at rosemont theater,