Arthur E. Morgan, Before you speak, listen. Two rounds a day are plenty. Retirement means that you'll just go ahead and live on your laurels and surf all day in Oceanside. We wish you the best of luck Ella Harris, "When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch." Farewell Tension. "This Ain't Goodbye" by Train. They said he was a real pro for a first offender. What did the police arrest the hospital patient for? Leonard Cohen, I need to retire from retirement. Oh, my friend, that can't be! Funny Cop Retirement Gift - Police Officer Retirement Poster By Adexyl $25.13 Copy of I Don't Always Enjoy Being a Retired Police Officer Poster By P4nd4store $24.69 I Don't Always Enjoy Being a Retired Police Officer Poster By P4nd4store $24.69 A Legendary Police Officer Has Retired Poster By HappyDelights $25.13 retirement 627 GIFs. tags: investment , investments , money , money-issues , money-management , money-quotes , moneymaking . 30. 2023 BDG Media, Inc. All rights reserved. 13. Financial planning tools and services to put you on the path to the future you want, Blog Sign up for Scary Mommy's daily newsletter for more stories from the trenches. George Burns, Age is an issue of mind over matter. The best funny retirement wishes for coworkers and colleagues include: The days of 9-5 are past! Chuck Knox, Without goals and plans to reach them, you are like a ship that has set sail with no destination. A man went to the Police Station wishing to speak with the burglar who had broken into his house the night before. Retirement may be looked upon either as a prolonged holiday or as a rejection, a being thrown on to the scrap-heap. Soni "It is better to live rich than to die rich." - Samuel Johnson Explore 22 smart and easy ways to boost retirement savings big! The basic mission of Police is to PREVENT crime and disorder. Vince Lombardi, "The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off." 124 Retirement Quotes: Funny Retirement Quotes, Inspirational Retirement Quotes and More! Its learning to live on less than you make, so you can give money back and have money to invest. I am graduating. "When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch" R C Sherriff. Discover and share police retirement quotes funny. "Heroes don't always wear capes." -Unknown. Sylvester Stallone - Judge Dredd. present this to you in recognition of Funny retirement sayings and quotes. Explore the options below for sample police retirement quotes, sayings, best wishes and more. Now, as the day dawns To return Click Here. I saw a fruit running from the police recently. The police retirement gifts listed above are awesome, for sure. To me, a job is an invasion of privacy. Unknown, He who laughs last at the bosss jokes probably isnt far from retirement. Unknown, There are some who start their retirement long before they stop working. Robert Half, Retirement: its nice to get out of the rat race, but you have to learn to get along with less cheese. Gene Perret, You cant retire from being great. Unknown, Some of the best memories are made in flip flops. Kellie Elmore, We make a living by what we get. Your happy retirement wishes in a greeting card, email, or text are a pat on the back, a standing ovation, a hearty toast celebrating both the accomplishment and expectations that retirement represents.. Tailor your best wishes to the retiree as well as your level of relationship or appropriateness given your . "There is no elegant way to protect sheep from hungry wolves." -Unknown. Satchel Paige, A goal without a plan is just a wish. You cant win until you do this. services professional who has a fiduciary relationship with you before making any type of investment or If you dont mind, it doesnt matter. Mark Twain, Retirement: no job, no stress, no pay! Unknown, Retire from work, but not from life. M.K. But I am happy you get to retire You always did inspire! Unknown, "When men reach their sixties and retire, they go to pieces. These words may help. However, the following funny retirement quotes for coworkers will help to make the retiring person smile by . What does it look like? the woman asked. and may you find joy and peace Bette Davis, "I need to retire from retirement." Else, I would have to go to the police station and report you to the cops. Pennsylvania State Police Department Seal 1) Retirement is the beginning of the time when you can sit back and give advice to others, even though you never followed it in your own life. 25. Scott Elledge, Retired is being twice tired, Ive thought first tired of working, then tired of not. Read more quotes about aging, retirement and motivation: Sedona Winds Retirement Communityoffersindependent living in Sedona, Arizona, can help! It is better to live rich than to die rich. Financial peace isnt the acquisition of stuff. You will always have a home here. 39. We, your Friends and Brothers, "We envy you, but are excited for you!". Max Asnas, Another good thing about being poor is that when you are seventy your children will not have declared you legally insane in order to gain control of your estate. If money is your hope for independence you will never have it. The time now has come; the time is in your own hands. They aren't going to get rid of me that way." Funny quotes Retirement quotes The basic mission of Police is to PREVENT crime and disorder. 2. Now you can easily and quickly add contacts from your email account (such as Gmail, Hotmail, Yahoo etc. One of my favorite parts of planning retirement parties is the opportunity to get all punny and think up funny cake sayings for retirement and invites. 18. #6 Dear husband, good luck on your next adventure together with me! 6. It is a chance to redesign your life into something new and different. As you plan retirement, figure out what to say in a retirement card or write a retirement speech, you will enjoy reading funny retirement quotes, inspirational retirement quotes and much more about this wonderful phase of life. Cars are backed up for miles. You cant win until you do this. 12. West, "Stay young at heart, kind in spirit, and enjoy retirement living." You just stole my heart. (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}). On what show do police officers solve crimes committed by garden gnomes? All the best! Lewis, Theres never enough time to do all the nothing you want. Bill Watterson, As in all successful ventures, the foundation of a good retirement is planning. Earl Nightingale, When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch. R.C. 52. "May all the years ahead bring you great joy and relaxation.". . . "Congrats on being so tired that you had to retire.". This positive song reminds people that retirement isn't a final goodbye. Facts about financial success later in life! Then its time for my nap. Bob Hope, Gainfully unemployed, very proud of it, too. Charles Baxter, The best thing about retirement is not having to wear pants. Mark Hewer, You might be on the back nine of life, but its good to finish strong. Morton Shaevitz, Retired is being tired twice, Ive thought, the first tired of working, then tired of not. Richard Armour, Youve heard of the three ages of man: youth, middle age, and youre looking wonderful. Cardinal Spellman, Goodbye to 9 to 5. A personalized crystal plaque engraved with a heartwarming message to the retiring law enforcement officer will mean the world to that public servant in your life. 4.5 out of 5 stars (455) $ 15.00 FREE shipping Add to Favorites Retirement Gifts. 34. So increasingly will be peace. Showing search results for "Police Retirement" sorted by relevance. No matter your connection to or feelings for cops, police jokes will have the whole family laughing. From the movie: Judge Dredd. Unknown, "Retirement: When you stop lying about your age and start lying around the house." You've done your hard time and now it's time to enjoy some freedom! William Shakespeare, Choose a work that you love and you wont have to work another day. Many folks think they arent good at earning money, when what they dont know is how to use it. A bloody clock!" So, I do it three or four times a day. Gene Perret, Im not just retiring from the company, Im also retiring from my stress, my commute, my alarm clock, and my iron. Hartman Jule, Retirement is when you stop lying about your age and start lying around the house. Unknown, Retirement, a time to do what you want to do, when you want to do it, where you want to do it, and how you want to do it. Catherine Pulsifer, Youre retired goodbye tension, hello pension. Unknwon, Retirement is wonderful. Jonathan Clements, Money is something you got to make in case you dont die. Bertrand Russell, Spend your free time the way you like, not the way you think youre supposed to. As we express our gratitude, we must never Sheriff, "Retirement is wonderful. This song shows that even goodbyes can be hellos to a new part of life. Bill Waterson, "Say goodbye to tension and hello to your pension." Retirement: When you quit working just before your heart does. The purr-petrator. which every Judge takes, outside these city walls, into the cursed Earth. What happened when 100 hares got loose on Main Street? 43. Abe Lemons, "We spend our lives on the run: we get up by the clock, eat and sleep by the clock, get up again, go to workand then we retire. For some, the work itself was the bliss, while for others, the work was the poison they couldn't wait to escape. Vince Lombardi, Retirement is the ugliest word in the language. Retired Legend . If you give one of these to a colleague, friend, or family member that is looking forward to retirement, it will surely help you communicate your appreciation. Having A Good Time Is My Job! What Are The Very Early Signs Of Dementia? Sandra Day O'Connor, "I wanted to have more time to play and reflect, but I find retirement more stressful than having a nice, steady job because I have to make decisions about where I want to be." When I was sixty-five I still had pimples." Does your kid want to be a policewoman when she grows up? Scott Cook 0 Likes Sponsored Links 60. Who works in tandem with the grammar police? Me: I'd like to interview the bartender wearing high heels and a leopard print dress. Officer: I have to give you a ticket for not wearing your glasses. Driver: Officer, I have contacts. Officer: I dont care who you know, youre still getting a ticket.. We go. "The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before the boss does.". JONATHAN CLEMENTS. For example, some Americans start a second career during retirement. 45. Carolyn Leigh and Cy Coleman, Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes on the grass under trees on a summers day, listening to the murmur of the water, or watching the clouds float across the sky, is by no means a waste of time. Hugh Hefner, Often when you are at the end of something, youre at the beginning of something else. Source Unknown, Do it yourself retirement planning: easy, comprehensive, reliable. Upon retirement, you will take the long walk . Retirement: That's when you return from work one day and say, "Hi, Honey, I"m home - forever." - Gene Perret " You know it's time to retire when the guys ask you if you're "getting any," you think it means sleep. You're no longer cuffed to a job. Just buy the haystack. Thats ridiculous. Present This to You as a Symbol of Terri Guillemets, Tips for retirement from the science of happiness, In retirement, I look for days off from my days off. Jean Chatzky sums it up for me: "Whether it's fly-fishing, taking your camper to the Everglades, or just traveling, everyone has got a little retirement dream. 26. The public are the police and the police are the public, and both share the same responsibility for community safety. Good Luck with Your Retirement which is going to haunt you. I was arrested by the grammar police for not using the full stop correctly. Funny Gifs Official site of the weekly web comic "Incompatibles" by Mario Estioko. Unknown, "The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before the boss does." Tennessee Williams, Dont look for the need in the haystack. You must gain control over your money or the lack of it will forever control you. Retirement is not impossible, get ahead with these tips to get ready! Author Unknown, Learn how age discrimination can threaten your future, Retirement may be looked upon either as a prolonged holiday or as a rejection, a being thrown on to the scrap-heap. Before he knows it, the bridge is right in front of him and his truck gets wedged under it. It's time to say goodbye, but I think goodbyes are sad, and I'd much rather say hello. Assisted Living Checklist: What To Ask & What To Look For, Quotes & Sayings For Retirement Cards 110 Quotes Continued, Retirement Party Ideas For Coworker | Canyon Winds, 30 Quotations About Getting Old - Desert Winds Retirement Community, Physical Games For Seniors - MeasurAbilities, LLC, 68 Retirement Wishes For A Boss - Canyon Winds Retirement, 65 Quotes About Getting Older | Funny & Inspirational Sayings, 55 Funny And Inspirational Quotes About Aging - Vista Winds Retirement, Motivational Fitness Quotes - Body Smith Fitness, 75 Funny Music Quotes - Amazing Mobile Music, 65 Getting Older Quotes | Chaparral Winds Retirement, Age is an issue of mind over matter. A state trooper pulled a farmer over on a rural road and said, Sir, do you realize your brother fell out of the car several miles back?, To which the farmer replied, Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!, This article was originally published on Oct. 29, 2019, A Man Went Viral For Refusing To Give Up His Spot On A Ride To A Crying Child, An American Mom Shares The Utter Magic Of Danish Playgrounds. Retirement's the most wonderful thing. Wishing you all the best in your new retired life. Five year old Little Johnny was lost, so he went up to a policeman and said, "I've lost my dad!". Funny police retirement quotes sayings. Leave the Relaxing to Her! For more information about our senior living facility, SLS Communities or to schedule a tour, please call us today at 623-544-4777. May we live up to your example. There are some who start their retirement long before they stop working. A woman was speeding down the road and was pulled over by a female police officer. Whos there? 11. Before cuffing the artist, he looked at the mural and said, Now that is bold.. Happy Retirement Quotes & Sayings In this section, you'll find both inspiring and funny retirement quotes you can add to a retirement greeting card message. The information presented is based on objective analysis, but it may not be the same that you Someone broke into the police station and stole all the toilets. Among other things, NewRetirement So if youre looking for inspiration, youve hit the mother lode. A word of warning. What kind of dinosaur works for the police? Author Unknown, To find joy in work is to discover the fountain of youth. Pearl S. Buck, Dont think of retiring from the world until the world will be sorry that you retire. Take financial wellness into your own hands and do it yourself retirement planning: easy, Antoine de Saint Exupery, In preparing for battle, I have found that plans are useless, but planning indispensable. Officer: No, I am an undercover detective. Tourist: So, why are you in uniform? Officer: Today is my day off.. Retirement Party. Before the officer can even say a word at the stop, the mandressed in a tuxedoblurts out, "Sir you have to listen to me". There s a retired person in the premises with not a lot to do and plenty of stories to tell. Keep in touch . 38. I am not. God bless the officers I work with. What is a police officers favorite type of tag? 32. Poke fun at the retiree or help them to revel in the fact they're retiring and everyone else isn't with these funny sayings. 30. Grammar Police Funny Sarcasm Quotes Literary T-Shirt . How can you tell if you are looking at a police glow worm? What a great silence in the office, since we don't hear your.. really not funny jokes! 90 Anti-Jokes So Serious They're Hilarious. Some people can't wait for that Social Security or pension check to land in their mailboxes as they can head straight to the lake or mountains. Get Started I win! and drove off. We all hope you enjoy your retirement. They arent going to get rid of me that way. Enjoy your new 7 day weekend Why did the officer give the ghost a ticket? Finally a police car comes up. George Burns, "Age is just a number, but retirement is one of the greatest gifts to mankind." #7 Dear husband, you have been successful all your life. Unknown, "How do you know it's time to retire? John Barrymore, You know youre getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while youre down there. Nellah McGough runs the day-to-day operations in the Southern Living Birmingham office, responds to reader questions and comments, manages freelancer contracts, and invoices. - Unknown We, the willing, led by the unknowing, are doing the impossible for the ungrateful. All the best for an amazing retirement! A trisara-cop. When a good cop leaves the 'job' and retires to a better life, many are jealous, some are pleased and yet others, who may have already retired, wonder. The police are working tirelessly to catch him. Betty Sullivan, "Retirement is not the end of the road. on the next chapter in your life, Samuel Johnson, In this country men seem to live for action as long as they can and sink into apathy when they retire. Retirement is just a never ending vacation. Retirement is not in my vocabulary. A Russian man goes to the secret police and says, My talking parrot disappeared., I called the cops about a murder on my front lawn. 13 Funny Retirement Quotes to Write in Retirement Cards Lindsay Tigar Updated: Jan. 13, 2023 Retirement is a happy, celebratory time where one can finally reap the benefits of multi-decade. Because he can stop a 10-ton truck by holding up his hand! We, the Officers of the Hartford Police Oftentimes, the words about retirement are close to depressing - they remind the retiree about the approaching senility or the loneliness of old days. They suspected it of fowl play, Do you know why diarrhea is hereditary? 48. Dishes. Julius Sharpe"There are some who start their retirement long before they stop working." "Congratulations on your retirement!". 11. However, my alarm clock and I have several years before we can reach that point. I call it bliss." "When men reach their sixties and retire, they go to pieces. "Enjoy being the master of absolutely nothing.". An officer sees a man exit a bar at closing time and get into his car. If you dont mind, it doesnt matter. I love you! The job you waited for for 50 years! "Here's to a well-deserved and happy retirement! in all your future endeavors! Money is only a tool. Are you a police officer? Dianne Nahirny, "A lot of our friends complain about their retirement. A Lifelong Friendship. "Enjoy your newfound freedom and make the most of it. They suspected it of fowl play. Know what you own, and know why you own it. I guess he wants a rematch because hes been following me for about 45 minutes. 7. Officer: "I have to give you a ticket for not wearing your glasses." Driver: "Officer, I have contacts." Officer: "I don't care who you know, you're still getting a ticket." New England Patriots/Giphy 31. 49. By subscribing to this BDG newsletter, you agree to our.
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